Copyright 1997, Richard Troy. Last update, September 23, 1997.

This email exchange occurred during the week of September 14th, and culminated with the poem/song by Richard Troy at the bottom on September 21, 1997.

If Jim and I were Friends

The following excerpts are from an exchange on the Karmann Ghia email list in mid September, 1997. Jim Patterson is the owner of House of Ghia. The other speaker is myself, Richard...

This one is a bit long, so here's a little help finding the interesting bits if you don't have patience for the setup...

Enjoy...

Introduction to this dialogue...

The poem "If Jim and I were friends." ...I think of it more as a song actually, though I don't have a score for it. Note the cadence, and pauses...

...

Enjoy:

...It all started when someone posted as a reply to an original question on another subject their own question about performing an engine swap between a '57 Ghia and a '70 Ghia... I posted with directions. Jim Patterson, owner of House of Ghia, responded with:


Pugnacious Pundits

A 40 hp engine in a '57 Ghia is a winner. (Except to Richard) A 40 hp engine in a '70 Ghia is a looser!

Pugnacious Pundits Passively Permit Peculiar and Palid Pap. Prudent Pundits Promote Precise Practical Painstaking thought thru Parables.


Primarily Prepended with P

(my response)

> A 40 hp engine
> in a '57 Ghia is a winner. (Except to Richard) A 40 hp engine in a '70
> Ghia is a looser!

An engine swap is one of the easiest things to do or undo - if the goal was to buy the owner time while a rebuild occurs, I see nothing worth discouraging in the endeavor. Since our requester did not provide those insights to intent, I find it unacceptable of me to presume it for him and respond morbidly, especially since I didn't have time or timidity to ponder the thought... On a good day I could do both swaps, drive em and put em back, all between breakfast and dinner...

> Pugnacious Pundits Passively Permit Peculiar and Palid Pap. Prudent
> Pundits Promote Precise Practical Painstaking thought thru Parables.

...Um, so I see you're a "Prudent Pundit", but the suggestion that perhaps I pugnaciously and passively permit peculiar palid pap is simply - preposterous!

...Preparation permits proper poignancy, purvueing possible permutations as prepatory to preserve precious pesos while promoting a positive post-operative prognosis of primary Prime-Movers _transition_ from present pre-disposition to post-modern perfection... Proving that prior planning prevents piss-poor performance thus permitting previously posted precious Ghia parts to remain part-and-parcel of a prospering provincial road system during potential post-deconstructionism and reconstructionism periods... Preponderance of possibilities provides a proposal as thus proposed, providing proof that previously posted prognostication regarding passive pundit palid pap was indeed puzzling, providing psychological purvue of our pre-eminent posters perspective and - perhaps - permitting pedantic postings primarily prepended with 'P's.

...

The Professor


Phooey!

To which several people, including Jim replied - most of which I didn't save apparently. In one of those posts it was remarked that they thought Jim and I were going at it against each other pretty hard and gee, shouldn't we stop? To that Jim replied:

Jim pontificated concerning installing earlier technology (40 hp engine) in a later Ghia (70 model year).

> >> Pugnacious Pundits Passively Permit Peculiar and Palid Pap. Prudent
>> Pundits Promote Precise Practical Painstaking thought thru Parables.

Richard Troy goes on to prove he has a dictionary with a larger "P" section.

> >...Um, so I see you're a "Prudent Pundit", but the suggestion that perhaps I
>pugnaciously and passively permit peculiar palid pap is simply - preposterous!
>
>...Preparation permits proper poignancy, purvueing possible permutations
>as prepatory to preserve precious pesos while promoting a positive
>post-operative prognosis of primary Prime-Movers _transition_ from present
>pre-disposition to post-modern perfection... Proving that prior planning
>prevents piss-poor performance thus permitting previously posted precious
>Ghia parts to remain part-and-parcel of a prospering provincial road system
>during potential post-deconstructionism and reconstructionism periods...
>Preponderance of possibilities provides a proposal as thus proposed, providing
>proof that previously posted prognostication regarding passive pundit palid
>pap was indeed puzzling, providing psychological purvue of our pre-eminent
>posters perspective and - perhaps - permitting pedantic postings primarily
>prepended with 'P's.
>
>...
>
>The Professor

Jim at House of Ghia

What a delight! What fun! Folks, particularly if you are from another culture, or if English is a second language, I wish to assure you these seeming verbal duels or jousts that Richard and I engage in, are pure fun. I know, that at times, the American sence of humor is hard to understand, and that based purely on the words we type, Richard and I could seem to be enemies, out to dirty the other fellas name, but nothing could be further from the truth. So sit back and enjoy. Richard and I do!

AH! Richard; did I detect you saying I was a Pig-headed purveyor of pungent pedantic prose primarily posted to pompously puzzle and placate phoneticly phlegmatic philosophizing. Well, I say phooey!


Poor Praise

> > >> Pugnacious Pundits Passively Permit Peculiar and Palid Pap. Prudent
> >> Pundits Promote Precise Practical Painstaking thought thru Parables.
>
> Richard Troy goes on to prove he has a dictionary with a larger "P" section.

Poor praise!... Didn't do didley with a dictionary!
...directly dictated, did I...

> What a delight! What fun! Folks, particularly if you are from another
> culture, or if English is a second language, I wish to assure you these
> seeming verbal duels or jousts that Richard and I engage in, are pure fun.
> I know, that at times, the American sence of humor is hard to understand,
> and that based purely on the words we type, Richard and I could seem to be
> enemies, out to dirty the other fellas name, but nothing could be further
> from the truth. So sit back and enjoy. Richard and I do!

Truth: Teasing through tact teaches tyrants thought.

Truth: Tact through teasing teaches tyrants too...

Truth: Teaching through teasing takes tasteful tact, thoughtfully tailored
through tender typing.

Placidity: Patterson parables preach practicable practicality; publicly
proffered, prodigiously presented, practically priceless pearls.


If Jim and I were Friends

If
  Jim,

and I,

were _friends_ ... 

you might not know it.

Our direct and pointed words

		might never seem to show it.

We'd laugh and tease,

		sometimes even cry

push, and gnash without appearance why!

why we might just yell and scream  - through our keyboards too!

		And no one but us would even know it's true!

...

...that Jim and I are friends

		of the very best kind

we poke and prod,

		and neither really minds

for we know we can from tasteful discourse depart!

		And not concern ourselves ... about the friendship part!

But if Jim and I were friends,

		how would you know it's true?

With Only Keyboard clashes, 

		how would we look to you?

Perhaps we should restrain
the keystrokes that we send?
Our minds retrain

but where will it all END? ...with boring letters we both regret to send?! So what would it be like if Jim here was my friend? -smile-